“Ok Kim, really?” you are probably asking yourself. “Just pluck some strings, do you what your teacher taught you- it’s not scary- get over it.” And for some people this is true but for me, getting in front of a group of people and playing music is almost enough to send me hyperventilating into a cowling heap in the corner.
These day I’ve been reading this amazing manifesto called The Law of Success by Paramahansa Yogananda (one of my yoga gurus). In it he offers an interesting insight into the dark and scary world of fear. Yogananda says:
Fear exhausts life energy… Fear causes the life force that ordinarily flows steadily though the nerves to be squeezed out, and the nerves themselves to become as though paralyzed…Fear doesn’t help you to get away from the object of fear; it only weakens your will power.
The professional musicians I’ve seen in concert have successfully overcome the disability of fear. Countless hours practicing in performance have squeezed every last ounce of fear from their bodies, making room for nothing but the beautiful flow of creative and illuminating music. I am far from the title of professional musician but on Monday I faced my fears and made myself play, plucking out simple tunes for those gathered at the Lodge to enjoy. Hopefully by doing something that scared me I am able to squeeze a little bit of the big bad scaries out of my head and make room for something more beautiful to grow.